Tag Archives: blog

Weekly Update #41

Today I actually had motivation. I wanted to get things done. It’s a change from what feels like my usual lethargy, and a welcome one at that! I got so much done today – I checked everything off my dauntingly long to-do list!

This sudden burst of productivity makes me want to just keep chugging on and plow through this depression-based lack of energy. I’m hoping this marks an upturn in my mood, but if not, maybe accomplishing small goals every day will help me manage this illness.

Today, I cleaned my living space, played a little Minecraft with M, switched my sheets from my spring/summer cotton to my amazing,y comfortable fall/winter flannel sheets and washed my comforter for the first time in probably two months.

I also started on the second of four cross stitches that I’m making for friends and family for Christmas. Trying to get an early start this year since needlework isn’t all I’m crafting. Also, it’s hard to craft things for people when I live with them and share the space that I need to craft in with them.

The other thing I started working on is revamping my blog. My goal is to have everything redone by the start of 2015. By everything, I mean redoing the layout, the pages, the posting schedule, the post structure itself, even redefining my blog. I’m basically aiming for a fresh blogging start for the upcoming new year. It gives me something to work towards.

Other than that, I floorwalked a bunch this past week and will hopefully do it a bunch more in this upcoming week. I also have my fingers crossed for a possible interview on Monday for a promotion within the company. So, we’ll see how this all goes.

Stay tuned to find out!

Blogging With Depression

I am not shy about talking about my depression.  In previous posts, I go into great detail about my struggle in dealing with depression.  I’ve been blogging for a little over a year now, and I’ve been through various phases of depression, with and without meds.  Currently, I am now off of the medication I’ve been taking since February, Fetzima.

Unmedicated, I have to relearn how to manage my depression.  It does affect my blog.  I have no motivation anymore to do much else aside from sleep and mindlessly watch TV.  Since I’ve yet to get the hang of scheduling posts, I still blog on a day-by-day basis of posting.  A post doesn’t go live unless I write it that day.

Even now, it is a struggle to make myself type out a post.  My bed is right behind me, I have Ghost Adventures playing in the background.  I want nothing more than to curl up under my covers and just stare at the TV screen.  I know I won’t really register the show.  I’m fine with that.  I just have zero motivation to do anything.

I am tired all of the time.  Prior to getting off my medication, I had severely restricted my soda intake, opting instead for water or tea.  But lately, I can drink two to three bottles of Mt. Dew a day and I get nothing from it.  Not even the tiniest energy boost to make it through my workday.

I know I need to force myself to keep working on my blog.  It’s something productive to do with my time and, honestly, I do feel better when I’ve done something I enjoy (or feel like I should enjoy because I’ve enjoyed it in the past).

Especially when it comes to the topic of depression and mental illnesses, I know I need to blog.  I am a very strong believer that the social stigma of depression needs to change.  We need to be able to talk about our mental illnesses in the same way we talk about our physical illnesses.  If I can add my voice to that change by discussing my illness through my blog, then all the more reason for me to push through my depression-based apathy and write.

Blog Organization

Over the past month and change, I’ve been trying a couple of different methods of organizing my thoughts and scheduling posts.

I tried a blog-specific organizational printable I found on Etsy.  It helped me get initially organized, but I found I’m not one to print out the weekly organizational pages.  On top of that, having it in a binder was a bit too large for me to comfortably work with.

I also tried using various planning apps, but none of those really stuck, either since I work across several different machines – my Mac, my iPhone and my iPad.  Some of the apps I tried didn’t sync across multiple machines, some of the apps I tried weren’t even available on all machines, and some of the apps just didn’t work for me.

But since it’s that time of year for all the glorious back to school supplies to stock the shelves.  I decided I’d try something a bit different and get a regular planner to see if I can make that work for me in terms of both organizing my thoughts and scheduling posts.  So far, it’s working pretty well.  But I just started using it last week.  So we’ll see how it goes.

Ultimately, I’m looking for a system that will let me plan in advance, jot notes down on the days the posts are supposed to go up.  I need something that will let me see a week’s spread at a time.  I really think this regular planner is going to work for that.  There’s even spaces in each week for notes that aren’t attached to a day.  Yeah, I think it’s really going to work for me, but I’ll follow up with how it’s working out.

What methods do you use to organize your blog?  Do you prefer to do everything on the computer/iPad/etc or do you prefer paper and pends?  Let me know in the comments!

Weekly Update #29

I know, I know, I was supposed to be posting steadily every week now. I have a blog planner and everything. I even got a lovely iPad mini for my birthday to make it easier for me to keep up with the posts.

Life happened, as life tends to. I fell off my usual schedule, fell off of writing my posts ahead of time. It was my birthday on Monday. I’m now 26! M was pretty sick for a few days before he finally went to the doctor and got some antibiotics. Yesterday was our six month anniversary.

But I’m getting back on track. Can’t beat myself every time I make a mistake or don’t quite follow through on my plans. As long as I keep taking steps towards my goals, that’s all I can do. Even if those steps get off track sometimes.

Let’s see… I’m writing this post on my new iPad. I’m kind of in love with it. I used to do most of my writing on an Acer net book, but that particular machine was a bit slow for my tastes. This iPad is so much quicker and lighter to carry around and it’s just a delight to use for blogging.

Look forward to this week for a few changes to the posting schedule. I’m going to try a new writing project. Should be a fun little experiment. Until then, dear readers.

Bloggity Blog Blog

So, as you may have notice if you’ve been following this blog from the beginning, I’m really terrible at keeping any sort of posting schedule.  I can keep up with one for about two weeks and then I run out of things to write about because I don’t write posts ahead of time, even when I am attempting to stick to a schedule.

I’ve spent some time thinking about where to take Day Old Sushi from here, how I can make it feel like a “real” blog, for lack of a better term.  I realized one of the reasons I have such a hard time sticking to a schedule is because I’m not very organized when it comes to the blog.  And by “not very” I mean “not at all” organized.

I went on etsy and found a blog planner from PlanInk that I’m using to organize and plan posts.  I’ve been looking for a while for a planner set up that works the way I need it to and is set up simply without sections I don’t need.  And this blog planner seems to be it.  So we’ll see if it live up to my expectations.  It already is helping me keep track of post ideas and scheduling them.

On top of the organization and scheduling issue, I feel like I’ve been lacking a general theme for the blog.  It’s felt somewhat directionless.  But I think I’ve finally figured out what my blog is going to be about: whatever I want it to be about!  I’m labeling it as a personal blog, with writing and craft overtones.  Organizing my thoughts and ideas about posts and the blog in general helped me pick a focus for Day Old Sushi to work from.

I’m ready to get serious about blogging and the first step is to get organized and stick to a schedule!

Weekly Update #21

Wow, so I fell off the planet for a bit there, didn’t I?  I’m out of hiding now, though, and ready to get back to business.  So, this is a weekly update, yeah?  I guess I’d better treat it more like a monthly update since it’s been about a month since I last wrote.

Okay, let’s see.  Still working at the call center.  Still not my favorite thing.  Still with my boyfriend. Still my absolute favorite thing.  In fact, these are the two things I’ve been spending all of my time on.  Picking up overtime at work and spending the rest of my free time with Mr. English whenever possible.  Oh, by the way, I decided the boyfriend’s nickname on the blog is going to be Mr. English.

On the topic of work, I’ve been skilled in web and member services for the past few weeks except for these last couple of days, where they’ve had me skilled in strictly member services.  I gotta say, I’m not a fan of member services.  80% of the calls are people telling me that I can’t do my job (PROTIP: I can) or that I’m the reason they’re going to die because I “won’t” give them whatever medication (PROTIP: I’m not the reason you’re not getting your meds.  The reason you’re not getting your meds is because you don’t order on time or don’t pay your bills, thanks very much).  I haven’t yet mastered the art of not taking things personally.  I mean, yeah, I give zero fucks about half the things these people are calling in about, but as soon as they turn the call into a personal attack, my first instinct is to take off my headset and just walk off that call floor.  My second instinct is to simply feign not being able to hear them and telling them to call back before disconnecting.

Of course, being the good little employee that I am, I do neither of those things.  But my issues with how not being face to face with someone makes people feel safe in dehumanizing the other party and this whole bullshit “the customer is always right” mentality will be addressed in another post (or three).

And now to the topic of my boyfriend.  Mr. English.  What a fucking sweetheart he is!  I can’t get over how lucky I got with him.  He’s put up with some of my crazy these past couple of weeks and I can’t thank him enough for being there for me.  I bet he thinks he didn’t really do anything, but he’s so good, he helped me without realizing he was helping me.

I’ve been off of my antidepressants for nearly two months before I was finally able to see a doctor and have them adjusted/the prescription renewed.  I was starting to feel the physical issues that came along with my depression.  Aching all over, lack of appetite, insomnia, and dissociation.  And the mental issues that came along with my depression also showed up for the fun.  Having Mr. English just text me out of the blue or would leave little notes in my locker at work or sometimes he buys me Mt. Dew and will place it on my desk at work and kiss the top of my head and even if I’m in the middle of a call, that kind of cheesy romantic shit made the beginnings of depression bearable.  And I count on him now more than ever because I’m now on an entirely new antidepressants and I know I can’t always tell when I’m acting off where as he can.

Well holy fuck, this post took forever to type.  I still have other things I need to get done tonight, like plan out more blog posts.  Or watch documentaries on Netflix.  Which is of course what I’m going to be doing, like a responsible blogger.

I really do plan on posting more than once a month, though.  Remember those New Years Resolutions I went on and on and on about?  I do plan on at least trying to stick to those.  Key word being trying.  But still.  Until next time, dear readers.

Resolutions

Every January, people all across the globe make promises to themselves to improve their lives in some way – lose 20 pounds, eat healthier, be happier, accomplish some sort of goal.  While not usually associated with religion, historically speaking, new years resolutions do have some connection to ancient religious traditions.  Babylonians made promises to their gods to return objects they borrowed and pay their debts.  Romans made promises to the god Janus, which is where the month of January gets its name.  Since then, the tradition of new years resolutions has become more of a western, secular practice.

Some of the most popular new years resolutions are health related – physical health as well as mental health.  Lose weight, eat healthy, start exercising, reduce stress, be happier.  Some goals revolve more around improving careers or education.  Get a better job, get a raise, earn better grades, spend more time studying.  Even other goals are socially oriented.  Make more friends, spend more time with family, get married/engaged, go out more.

My goals are none of those things.  Well, yes, I have general goals to be healthier and to learn new things, but my new years resolutions for 2014 are focused on this blog, actually.  My resolutions are to blog three times a week, set achievable and realistic goals for the blog (i.e. have a post reach 50 views, gain 100 followers), and my biggest goal of this year is to reach 5,000 total views on this blog.  I’m currently sitting at 500 views and change and I feel like if I stick to posting regularly, I can absolutely get to 5,000 views in twelve months.

I do have one other goal for the new year that is not related to this blog.  I want to write and self-publish a collection of short stories.  When I was in high school, I’d write just about every day.  Now that I’m through with college (three times) and working in the real world, I find I have to force myself to write pretty much anything – blog posts included.

Making these promises to myself to write three posts a week as well as write enough short stories to create a collection is a way for me to make sure I’m practicing writing.  Even if it’s just a post about my new years resolutions, trying to make three posts a week on the blog is helping me create a habit of writing.  The blog posts will translate into writing short stories, which by the end of the year, I should have a decent selection to choose from.  And from what I understand, self-publishing a book is fairly easy (as opposed to shopping my work from publisher to publisher).

So I’d like to end with a thank you to all those people who’ve read my blog thus far.  I hope you continue to read about my life in the coming year, and I hope I’m at least slightly entertaining.  And to those of you who are reading my blog for the first time, thank you as well.  I hope you stick with me, too.  And if you’re reading this months or even years after this post has gone live, thank you for sticking with me.  I have (hopefully) come a long way, and I will (hopefully) continue to grow as a writer and a person because of this blog.

Weekly Update #19

Things happened this week like they do every week.  And I’m going to write about them.  Also like I do every week.

Let’s start with work things.  This past week was my last week in abay (a type of on-the-job training) and also my last week of ungodly 10-hour days.  Starting Tuesday, I go into my production schedule, meaning I no longer have to attempt to function in the mornings since my shift doesn’t start until 11:30.  I did, however, pick up some overtime.  Two hours on Monday, then I go in an hour early on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Saturday.  Time and a half pay, yes please!

Moving on to personal life things, I’m happy to announce that I’m now officially dating the guy I’ve been seeing for the past month.  I haven’t come up with a clever pseudonym  for him yet, so for the time being I’ll just call him the Boyfriend.  I know I’ve referred to him as my boyfriend in at least one previous post, but labels are tricky.  And also don’t matter to me as much in this relationship as they did in previous relationships.

I’m more content spending time with someone I feel comfortable in my own skin around, someone that enjoys my company as much as I enjoy his.  Conversation flows easily between us and silence is comfortable.  I know I’ve said this about previous guys I’ve been involved with, but this time I really mean it when I say it feels natural to be around Boyfriend.  Not to mention, I’ve met his family and he’s met mine.  That hasn’t happened since my very first boyfriend, six years ago.

This relationship is a learning experience for me.  I haven’t made the best life choices when it comes to who I choose to involve myself with romantically.  So being in a relatively normal, stable relationship is actually kind of throwing me for a loop.  I’ll write more about this all in a later post, but it’s just really amazingly nice to be where I am right now (both in my relationship with Boyfriend as well as the fact that I’m sitting on his bed, typing this post at this very moment).

I’m kind of at a loss of how to end this update.  I guess I’ll leave it here and go do some research for some future posts so I can stick to my New Years resolution of posting three times a week.

Congratulations! Your 2013 Evolved Into 2014!

I know I’m a few days late, but I only had one day off this week and I spent it with my guy (sorry not sorry, readers).  I just wanted to throw in a quick follow up post mainly to complete the joke in the title of my last post of 2013 and my first post of 2014.  Because I think Pokemon references are incredibly clever.

I’m writing this post in the morning before my last day of work for the week.  I’m staring down a 10+ hour shift (depending on how long I get stuck on the phone after I’m supposed to be clocked out) that I really really really really really don’t want to go to.  January is the busiest month at work because of all the new insurance plans and all the fun ACA stuff that everyone wants to call in and complain about.  Love it.  So much.

I apologize if this post doesn’t make much sense.  I haven’t had any caffeine yet and I only have about 10 minutes to throw this post together before I have to get going and get to work.

So, everyone else is writing about New Years Resolutions.  I guess I can write about that, too.  I don’t have many.  I don’t think I made any resolutions last year.  Just be happy or some touchy-feely crap like that.  This year my goals are a bit more concrete.

2014 NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS

  1. Blog 3x a week
  2. Reach 5,000 total views
  3. Write and self-publish a collection of short stories
  4. Set up an etsy shop for crafty things
  5. Continue with my new kick-ass-take-names confidence
  6. Get organized (by getting rid of all the shit I’ve collected that I don’t need)

And that’s really about it in terms of resolutions.  This year I really want to focus on creating something long-term.  I’ve had blogs before where I write for a few months and then get busy or bored and stop posting.  I don’t want to let Day Old Sushi fall into a state of decay, no matter how busy I may get with work or life.

I’ll write a more in depth post about my reflections on 2013 and my goals for 2014 this weekend, but right now, I need to put on pants and go make some money.

Weekly Update #17

One more week closer to Christmas, dear readers!  Are you all getting excited for the holiday?  Or whichever holiday you celebrate?  I sure am!

This week saw me on the phones at work for the first time (finally).  I can’t say that I enjoy being on the phones.  But what I can say is that I hate being on the phones.  I am very much dreading having to take calls all day tomorrow.  I really really really really really don’t want to do it.  I have panic attacks making calls myself, why on earth did I think I could take calls for a living?!  Oh past Kate, how naive you were.  Or desperate.  Probably desperate.  For money.  Like I still am.  Cough student loans cough.

Anyway, I actually got a lot done this weekend.  I was gonna take it easy and do fuck all in preparation for the hell that will be taking calls for eight hours, but yesterday I went shopping with my parents and got quite a few things I needed for my myriad of DIY gifts as well as a bunch of organizational/storage stuff for my basement.  Hanging the shelves I bought was a nightmare, but at least my latest obsessions – POP! vinyl figures – have a home away from curious kitty paws.

What else?  Hm.  Oh!  I got a WOW at work.  First day of calls, I had a sweet older lady tell me that I was the kindest person at ESI that she’d ever spoken to.  And it just so happened that not only did that make me not go hide in the bathroom and cry that day, but the quality control department pulled that particular call to listen to.  Which lead to me getting the WOW award.  It really isn’t a huge deal outside of the fact that I can be proud of myself for doing my job correctly and being recognized for it.  Actually, that was the main reason I quit my job at Mall of America.  I felt that no matter how far above and beyond I felt I was going in my job, I was never praised for my work, only told how to do things differently/”better.”  It really takes a toll on an employee when they feel like nothing they do really matters.  Yeah, I used to literally clean up shit for a living, but would it have killed management to tell me I was doing a good job cleaning up that shit?

And the most important thing I have to announce today.  I went ahead and bought myself the domain name for Day Old Sushi as an early Christmas gift for myself.  I also bought a licence to use the artwork in my header, which was really cool for me because those sushi are super cute!  So, I re-did the whole layout/scheme/theme/whatever you wanna call it for the blog yet again.  I know I have a bad habit of changing things spur of the moment and quite often, but I put a lot of work into this look and it’s gonna be sticking around.  So, let me know in the comments if you like it!

Well, I’m about ready to call it a night, dear readers.  I bought myself a set of flannel sheets and let me tell you it’s like sleeping on a cloud of glorious softness and warmth.  It makes it about a billion times harder to get out of bed in the mornings (which is already difficult because I’m the opposite of a morning person).  But I’m not gonna complain because flannel is so comfy I wish my very skin was made out of it!